The Idiot Next to Me <$BlogRSDUrl$>

The Idiot Next to Me
Yes, I'm Serious.

Don't Think!

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Are we allowed to think anymore? Are others allowed to listen to our thinking? Could it be possible that somewhere out there, a cure for cancer has been discovered? What if office politics and corporate policy prevented that cure from going public?

So the scientist discovers that they can dissolve cancer cells with this new drug, but the scientist is only fresh out of school, or had problems getting to the lab on time for a week… would this make people not listen to him?

This is how it works in the corporate world. Guess what… medicine is now a part of the corporate world.

I was a strategist at my former job, I helped save the company time, resources, money, increase revenue and decrease churn. My job was to data mine and research patterns in revenue, quality, and performance. Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am no longer employed with that company. My wife became pregnant the day I lost my job and so, in an act of desperation, I applied everywhere for any position that would bring in a monthly income.

So it’s been about 9 months now, the new baby is here and I am ready to move up the ladder again… But guess what… I’m the new guy. I studied the flow and process, analyzed it, drew up a better plan, and presented it to some higher ups.

I was told to worry about myself and focus on my own flow and procedures.

So I start to focus on technology… and get presented with an interesting email. It seems that one of the idiots at our corporate headquarters thinks that one of our products if flawed and needs to be changed. Having worked in this industry for 5 years, I spotted the issue right away. The truth? It’s working as intended. The ‘fix’ they want to implement would actually hinder the product and make it perform at a lesser level of quality for the consumer. (six sigma anyone)


So I take this data to someone, ask how I can get in contact with the idiot at corporate, and I’m told that I have to submit it to some far off department that has some sterile name (more on that later) and that so and so would look at it, reproduce the data to his own version to verify it, then take it to corporate himself.

What?

Someone else gets to rewrite it and hand it in with his name on it?

Sorry, I’m keeping my strategies to myself… maybe even taking it to other companies.

So… anyone hiring?

The point? You are not allowed to think. Do no share your ideas. Just smile and nod and try to be the best ‘yes man’ you can be.

Meanwhile… others will either suffer or fail to benefit.