The Idiot Next to Me <$BlogRSDUrl$>

The Idiot Next to Me
Yes, I'm Serious.

Idiot Bastards

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Listen up assholes... and you know who you are.

When I blog and use this as an outlet or to create awareness of how a company uses poor business practices, I don't expect idiots to post comments about me elsewhere on the internet.

Blah blah blah if you're so smart then start your own company blah blah blah... Shut it!

A few things to point out:

  1. I am not Dave. Please know what you are talking about and who you are commenting about when you leave comments. You know what... just don't comment anything unless you run it past at least a 3rd grader.

  2. Are you going to fund me to start my own business? Then shut up!

  3. When I visit your blog and see all your political ranting, blah blah blah red state this and blah blah blah democrats that... I don't go off and post on “other peoples blogs” that if you think you can do a better job that you should run for president.

  4. You were linked to a totally different blog, but yet you went through the trouble of hitting the back button before you clicked on 'comments'.

  5. You are 50 years old. Get the fuck off the internet! Go do the things 50 year olds are supposed to be doing these days... clicking on free anti virus offers in your AOL email inbox and trying to figure out how to end a call on a flip phone and reading books to small children while your country is under attack.

In closing, I would like to say that I love the feedback... just make sure that you are not leaving my blog to go to someone else's blog and talk trash to them as if they wrote it.

Footnote: Go see a doctor about that... they have pills now that help you with clear thinking when you get up in the years.


Well... since most of you wont think... either because you choose not to or because the man keeps your mental stimulation down... how about trying to read?

I came across an article about a man who wants to sue his VOIP service provider because he couldn't reach 911 and his 4 year old son almost died.

Before reading on... lets see a show of hands for everyone who knows the problem here... go on, stick your arm out your front door or window...

Let me give you a few more details... The father (I use the term loosely) ordered Voice Over IP telephone service as a replacement for his home phone. He also canceled his mobile phone as he has opened his own home based business and doesn't need a phone when he is away from home.

Figured it out yet? That's right... he didnt read... anything... ever.

Now I have worked in telephony for a while... from digital land line service to mobile phones... I myself use a VOIP service on my PC. However, before I had this experience... I knew that you may not get in contact with 911 using VOIP. How do I know this? I took the time to research the service I was paying for.

Okay... so the guy didnt read his contract or his terms of service... or even the FAQ... but hey... somewhere in the house he still has his old deactivated cell phone! (show of hands again please)

Oh wait... he never in his life saw an article about 911 and E911 service being accessable from a cellphone. He never looked it up... but who would? He was paying (at the bare minimum) $40.00 per month for service and he never bothered to read anything about it, ever. If he would have, he would know that you can dial 911 from a deactivated cellphone.

So this idiot called the VOIP provider at 2am and demanded that he be transfered to the home phone of the CEO so he could complain about (his lack of reading and personal knowledge) poor service... that he knows nothing about.

Translation for the idiots out there: If your cheap phone service doesnt let you dial 911 you can use your cell phone even if the cell phone service is disconnected.

For those of you who don't know... and for those of you who are rotten parents and put all your faith and trust into a cheap phone system alternative... get the facts and get a mirror before you start finger pointing.

Read, think, click... 911 VOIP info and 911 from a disconnected mobile phone (tough one there) and (the FCwho?)

From the FCC site:

Basic 911 Rules

The FCC’s Basic 911 rules:

  • Require wireless carriers to transmit all 911 calls to a Public Safety Answering Point (PSAP), regardless of whether the caller subscribes to the carrier’s service or not.


Should I keep my traditional phone line after I subscribe to VoIP service? Top
Yes. 9-1-1 industry leaders recommend that you keep your traditional phone line in addition to your VoIP phone service in order to successfully access 9-1-1 services and to have telephone access during a power outage.

(pretty much the whole FAQ)

When young people commit crimes or kill others, society blames Marilyn Manson and video games... Who gets the blame when a parent almost lets his 4 year old son die because the parent chose to be an idiot?

Don't Think!

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Are we allowed to think anymore? Are others allowed to listen to our thinking? Could it be possible that somewhere out there, a cure for cancer has been discovered? What if office politics and corporate policy prevented that cure from going public?

So the scientist discovers that they can dissolve cancer cells with this new drug, but the scientist is only fresh out of school, or had problems getting to the lab on time for a week… would this make people not listen to him?

This is how it works in the corporate world. Guess what… medicine is now a part of the corporate world.

I was a strategist at my former job, I helped save the company time, resources, money, increase revenue and decrease churn. My job was to data mine and research patterns in revenue, quality, and performance. Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am no longer employed with that company. My wife became pregnant the day I lost my job and so, in an act of desperation, I applied everywhere for any position that would bring in a monthly income.

So it’s been about 9 months now, the new baby is here and I am ready to move up the ladder again… But guess what… I’m the new guy. I studied the flow and process, analyzed it, drew up a better plan, and presented it to some higher ups.

I was told to worry about myself and focus on my own flow and procedures.

So I start to focus on technology… and get presented with an interesting email. It seems that one of the idiots at our corporate headquarters thinks that one of our products if flawed and needs to be changed. Having worked in this industry for 5 years, I spotted the issue right away. The truth? It’s working as intended. The ‘fix’ they want to implement would actually hinder the product and make it perform at a lesser level of quality for the consumer. (six sigma anyone)

So I take this data to someone, ask how I can get in contact with the idiot at corporate, and I’m told that I have to submit it to some far off department that has some sterile name (more on that later) and that so and so would look at it, reproduce the data to his own version to verify it, then take it to corporate himself.


Someone else gets to rewrite it and hand it in with his name on it?

Sorry, I’m keeping my strategies to myself… maybe even taking it to other companies.

So… anyone hiring?

The point? You are not allowed to think. Do no share your ideas. Just smile and nod and try to be the best ‘yes man’ you can be.

Meanwhile… others will either suffer or fail to benefit.

You are all idiots... still.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Yea yea... I'm back. Too many idiots to just sit back and watch. People are stupid and need to be exploited. I feel it is my duty as an asshole to do such.

For example... I just got sick... I know, that's what I get... karma and all that... so I go to the doctor and he tells me that I am going to lose my eye and may have brain damage. Yea... so I'm freaking out. I start thinking that I'm going to end up all dumb and have speach problems and not be able to do simple math and stop using the letter "g". (huntin, fishin, watch uh doin). The doctor tells me to relax, that brain damage does not mean that I am moving to the south side of OKC.

But what about all the other stuff... the eye loss, the brain damage... and it's only getting worse he says.

So I go get a second opinion a few days later... Pink Eye. Basic childhood eye infection. She makes fun of my other doctor and gives me some medicated eye drops... a few days later I'm as good as new with clear vision and no mouth breathing or mulletts.

So my other doctor is an idiot... I have a new doctor... and an empty karma pot ready to fill again.

Stay tuned to hear about my promotion at work and all the idiots involved in that...

Honorable Mention

Tuesday, March 22, 2005
Been to the major news sites this morning? Don't bother... it's a boring rerun. Some kid goes into his school and... get this... kills a bunch of people. Ohhhh... then himself... ohhh.... big deal.

Yea, I know... poor attitude huh. That's how I felt the major news sites were looking at it. Remember when Columbine happened? The sites were covered with stories and photos... now MSNBC has it all covered in one link. On CNN the chick with brain damage still has the spotlight. For a moment, I almost thought CNN wasnt even running the story.

How depressing. Now let's move on to the other part of this story.People... listen... there is a pattern here. If you have children... please please teach them that picking on others is not nice. Not only that... it will get you killed.

Headline on MSNBC reads:

Native American teenager who killed nine people called himself "NativeNazi" and was picked on by other students for his behavior.

I'm sorta glad this isnt getting the big time exposure that Columbine did. I don't think I could stomach any more "It was drugs, it was the NRA, it was Marilyn Manson..." No, it was the kids.

For example, I live in Oklahoma City... Oklahoma is full of mouth breathing wanna-be cowboys (most have never seen a cow up close). When I was in high school, the people to fear were the jocks who listened to country music and didnt do drugs. But these same kids were also the ones who would publicly humiliate weaker students in the food court, trip them in the halls, deface their vehicle... make a young man feel like he was just a shell of a man. When you make someone hit rock bottom... dont panic when they perform acts of desperation. What else do they have to live for? You and your little group of 'wouldnt hurt a fly' mouth breathers already showed him that.

Look at some of this...
Student Sondra Hegstrom, 17, told the Minneapolis Star Tribune that Weise was into goth culture, wore "a big old black trench coat," drew pictures of skeletons, listened to heavy metal music and "talked about death all the time."

Why mention his clothes? If it was the school nerd, would they mention that he was wearing double knit slacks and a pocket protector?

"They didn't think anything of it," Hegstrom said, but "he got terrorized a lot" by others who called him names.

Sound familiar? See the pattern yet?

Relatives of Weise told the St. Paul Pioneer Press that Weise's father committed suicide four years ago, and his mother lives in a Minneapolis nursing home because she suffered brain injuries in a car accident, the relatives said.

Hmm... cant imagine what they picked on him about. Yep, there it is... if you listen to 'metal' and wear all black, then you must be a killer. Damn you for buying Manson's latest CD and damn your parents for buying that gun and not locking it up better.

Those poor poor students who made good grades, listened to adult music, dressed in bright colors...

Before you go off and think that I am on the side of the son-of-a-psycho-bastard-child-goth-punk let me set you straight. I think what he did was so terribly wrong. I think of all those parents and grandparents who are in such great loss over this and it makes me sad.

Priests wear all black and are in a room with a giant statue of a dead guy with wounds on his body all day. Remember the quote, 'He was into the goth culture (look up the definition for gothic then think of how the big churches have huge arches and vaulted ceilings) wore a big black trench coat (like a long flowing gown of black? Like a priest) and drew pictures of skeletons (hanging out with a statue of a dead body with a gaping hole in his side)'. Why don't people say 'No wonder that priest committed those crimes, he wears black all the time and is obsessed with statues of dead bodies.'???

I'm ranting... I know... it's what I do.

What would happen if next time, some kid killed only himself in the privacy of his own home. Let's say he left a note and this note said 'I couldnt stand being picked on at school for not falling in line with all the sheeple. They picked on me and humiliated me to the point of non existence. This is the final step. Bye.'?

Listen up kids... if you are getting picked on at school... bulk up. Take a few classes on how to defend yourself, find others like yourself who are the victim of similar abuse to join your cause, and everyday... for days on end... beat the living shit out of the nice boys who call you names and knock you around. Yes, they are going to hit you back... so what. They are probably hitting you anyway. While I believe that violence is NOT the answer to anything... beating the hell out of some loud ass mouth breather is much better then killing people.

So beat them down, just fists and feet... so bad they end up in the hospital for a few hours... maybe even a day... then when they get out... do it again. It will be more fun the second time because they will be in bad shape from the first time. While beating them you can make fun of their stitches and scars.

Someone will eventually come around and ask you why you are doing this... Then you can hold your head up high and say, 'because they pick on me... because I'm different... because they need to learn respect, and no one else is obviously going to teach them...' Tell them you are doing this to make them think twice about knocking someones books out of their hands, or calling someone a name in the halls... tell them that you are beating the hell out of these wonderfull students to help save lives.

I'm sure I lost some friends writing this... and I'm sure people are angry... and I know for sure that people are going to miss my point. I am not taking the side of the children who kill... not in the acts they commit. I am not saying the victims got what they deserve... He shouldnt have killed those people, and they shouldnt have pushed him. Same with Columbine.

Parents, teach your children not to hate, teach them tolerance, teach them also that some people do certain things because of the way they were raised, and they don't have free thinking or a will to be an individual. Tell your children not to pick on others because of the way they look or the type of music they listen to. Tell them that even though some people look like they are sheep in a flock, it is not okay to slaughter them as such.

That didn't take long.

Monday, March 21, 2005
I decided. My birthday is this saturday. The 26th. I will be 30 years old. (no, im not taking it well)

I am closing down this blog. Between now and saturday I will come make one final public judgment aginst TINtM and all other idiots... it will be my swan song. These next few days will be the requiem for the idiot next to me.

I will start another blog... and those who I chose will gain access to a deeper more in depth Dividual Reality as my own personal requiem begins.

See you between now and then.

What to do....

So, when I started this blog I broke one of the rules... one of the Blog Commandments... because I broke that sacred law, I am not even at liberty to disclose which law that is.

It's part of the blogging code, and I dishonored it.

I feel I have no choice now but to start over again... and this time do it right.

I'm thinking about it... I hope everyone understands... understands the rule that I broke that is.

Shame on me.

Make it stop!

Friday, March 18, 2005
Oh boy oh boy. I have been busy at work the past few weeks. Thus, no blogging. I have been sneaking around all my important people's blogs.

So much to blog, so little time.

On the up side, I may even have less time to blog in the comming weeks.

Meh... I'll be around.

Geek Essentials

Thursday, February 24, 2005
(can you tell that the idiot next to me is on vacation? It's too quiet around here)

I just got a new PC. I don't want to brag, so no details. =) I am installing all my apps and games and dloading all the little bells and whistles... the things I can't live without.

So I was wondering, while my essentials are Trillian, Office/Frontpage 2003, my various P2P clients, Unreal Tournament 2004, and FireFox... what is essential for other geeks? (and dont tell me that you are not a geek... geek is sheik baby!)

Let's see what the must haves are for you on your square headed life mate.

I listed 5... can you?

Mimi made me do it.

Tuesday, February 22, 2005
So, in chasing the trail of blogs I came across Mimi and well... here it is...

Book Game by Texas Biscuit. Here are the rules:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.

One hand was raised, palm flat, while the other one curved around her body, following the drape of her garb. "Her hand is empty, but there's a little hollow right here," the elf pointed out. "Fill it with a jewel that has a special meaning for you and Khyrra and Our Lady of Joy will stand in my stead at your wedding tomorrow".

-Blood Sport
Christine Golden
Forgotten Realms, The Best of The Realms Book I
(gotta love those elvish vampires)

Tag! Yer it!

I'm not so bad after all

To prove I have a soft side... I'm going to give something away.

I 25 gmail accounts up for the taking. I know I know, gmail is old news... everyone has one... well, It's all I have here in the digital world to give away other then nude pics of myself... and I want to make friends, not scare them away.

So, either comment here or send me an email and I'll hook ya up with an invite.

Pass it on.

And the review...

I love having Sunday and Monday off. Tonight I went to the movies downtown. It was a good experience. Monday night at 9pm in Oklahoma City... no one is at the movie. This way, I can enjoy the movie without *cough* 'people' getting in the way of my movie going enjoyment.

-If I go on a Friday or Saturday night of opening weekend, it's bad. I like to sit in the very back row so no one is able able to sit behind me. Many people do this. So then the back row, even the back 5 rows get filled up fast. Then, it never fails, along comes a group of 5 people... either during the ever important previews or some time in the first 10 min of the movie... walking all the way up to the top/back row, which was full long ago, and they decide to stand there while discussing amongst themselves a place to sit. I came here to see a damn movie! Not watch you be an idiot because you are late! 100% of the time there are about 30 seats all bunched together just waiting for you to take one. Yea, on the front row... that's right. And that is usually where these people end up in the long run. So next time, do yourself a favor and go straight to them rather then stand at the end of my row (sometimes even right next to me) and yak yak yak with your mating partner and offspring.

The Movie

Constantine. Based off the Vertigo/DC comic 'Hellblazer'. Keanu Reeves. Over sized Zippo lighter. Thick in demonology and the occult. Impressive. Fresh. Clever. Good, but not great. Go see it.

Yea... my first movie review! I think I'll keep that format. That should win friends and get me lots of invites to mega ultra dinner parties.

constintine, technology, and the general public.

Monday, February 21, 2005
I hate the general public at movie theatres on opening weekend. They are rude and talk too loud and walk around like they are blind.

Anyway, I am sitting in down town Okc at the new harkins theatre blogging on my BlackBerry in the Cine Capri.

Constantine is tonights feature. I will write up a personal review of the film and overall experiance when it's over.

lol what's with that lol?

Sunday, February 20, 2005
OMFG! (I assume we all know what that means.)

Has 'lol' became the new 'like'? Seriously. lol I was reading a movie review message board lol and there was this person lol who said lol every few lines. lol. Give me a break lol. lol, isn't this annoying?

Yes, I know what lol means, I am phat with your skinney, I am picking up what you are putting down. You are teh leet d00de and you roxxor my boxxorz. In other words, I'm hip to the lingo.
laugh out loud or lots of laughs. I understand that 'kids will be kids' but adults are doing this as well, lol. I even see people doing it in text messages from a cell phone.

*Keep in mind, laugh out loud or lots of laughs.

Call me crazy, but when I write something personal (personal as in non professional/work related) I made it a habit to write as if I am speaking to the reader. We all have our 'written communication voice' and our 'verbal communication voice'. I try to make them both one voice. I, like many people, try to imagine the voice of the person in my head. Especially if it's someone I know personally.

So imagine if you will, the following being spoken... '(hysterical laughter) I'm having dinner with Jacob (hysterical laughter) and Crystal shows up at the resturant (hysterical laughter) and she asked Jacob how he got here and he said his car (hysterical laughter).

OMFG! Can you say trip to the hospital in a clean reversible backwards white coat?

Is it really that funny? If so, then why doesn't the reader burst out in laughter too? Could it be that you are just an idiot?

Somewhere between Ambrose Bierce, Frederick Nietzsche, and Darwin are all the answers I am looking for.